Has Anyone Seen

Tape #5  Yet?

Because, I have. And I want to discuss it. With everyone. I want everyone to watch all of the tapes. I want everyone to see them, feel them... Read the journals. Read the coroner's report. Read everything.

And tell me...

Is there really a glimmer of hope, or am I just in denial?

Say what you want, but I am torn. The evidence all in front of me... all of it saying different things. I just want some cold, hard TRUTH. I am sick of not knowing... or am I better off that way? Not knowing... But I've been thinking this way the entire time. The things that he stated on Tape #5 are all things that I have theorized and debated since the night I found out he "died." And I know that I am not the only one. It was whispered about and discussed at the memorial, it is talked about freely now between certain siblings, parents, step-parents...

I've made a decision. Since I have already accepted the fact that I will never see him again, I have decided that I must find out if there is even a shadow of a doubt...

Did Joshua David Goddard Fake His Own Death?

Doubtful, but... there is a chance. And, yes, maybe it will hurt to do all this digging and obsessing only to prove that he really is dead. But, alas... The idea of him living, breathing, learning... it is too powerful and important for my own life's happiness to not try to prove that the idea is a fact.

I've decided to go to New Zealand. I will visit with the police that handled the case, I will see the place where it happened. I will view the coroner's pictures, as someone should have done all along, and I will find out, once and for all, what really happened to my brother. Only about $5000 more and I will be set and on the first plane to Auckland.

Any feedback, please send to heartshapedbox15@gmail.com

Love Always,

jax