"Words are my fists.
My pen is my sword.
My voice is my power.
Seeker of knowledge,
I ramble and thrash
for the TRUTH.
All the while exposing myself
and allowing growth from within.
Ultimately hoping that this journey
will lend some meaning and clarity
to this long winding road of life."

*  *  *  *  *  *

Loud

02.01.04

by JDG

I feel loud!

I am loud!

When I speak,

others hear!

When I yell,

people fear!

I'm just like you,

except I am loud.

When you hear me,

you have feelings.

When you see me,

you feel something.

I am here.

Deal with it.

I don't want to be loud,

but I am.

When will I begin to help myself?

I can yell,

I can crawl,

but can I swim?

Without your reaction, I fall beneath the cracks,

without your emotion, I lose touch.

I need to be loud, yet I don't want to be.

What kind of shit is this thing?

Stay in bounds,

follow the leader...

find my way?

Tip my glass,

flex my wrist,

what next?

Alive how?

When are you sure?

How can I tell?

Take your measurements,

make your adjustments

without my willingness.

You are a failure, aren't you?

You can't tell me

you know it all.

I see, I hear,

I think without a care.

Why can't my sight

end this fight?

The sky tells me now,

my heart is shy and unaware.

10% off drives my brain,

when do I wake up?

Why am I here?

For whom am I for?

I can't you reason

anymore than I can give you rhyme,

nor spell for that matter.

page filled blue

by JDG       

Lost loves full of missed opportunities,

when reflected upon, create personal miseries.

Wounds that have closed, then magically reopen

continually healing and unhealing, fully unspoken.

Inner pain with anguishing sweaty palms

drip into my thoughts and slowly become songs

to share forever with you

through this page filled blue.

This is what I choose to do,

it holds the human race together like glue

but not without you

the seeker of wisdom

and inventor of pain.

Heed the lessons I learned

and burn them into your brain.

Cause and effect belong to us all

but your life and my life

will never shorten the fall.

Journey to the bottom

so you can tell me how it is,

fly swift and fast

with a heart full of bliss.

The goodness of truth

will always prevail

even the evil deeds

get held by the nail.

baby blues

by JDG

Your eyes show me the truth

Blinding and forever true

Original with them baby blues

Two satellites, beaming me a view

With reckless abandonment I choose

Those original baby blues.

Your eyes show me the truth

Blinding with eternal truth

You're an original production with them

Intruiging and seductive baby blues.

secret s.o.b.

     by JDG

Windows locked with blinds drawn

Blacked out sun, blacked out dawn

My crazy mind makes me the pawn

Got people thinkin' that I'm gone.

Night time comes and I'm inside

creepin' and a-stirrin' on this here ride

doors locked twice, I gotta hide

I'm a secret S.O.B. and I don't know why.

Millions of letters, end to end, all over the place

substitutions for self expression trapped in a head case

Piles and piles of golden leaflettes lay to waste

thoughts once thought of, forgotten flashes post haste.

Secret S.O.B. is my ranking, thank you

don't invite me into your life of new

Questions from you end up empty and blue

cause I'm a secret S.O.B. and I ain't tellin' you.

Urgently escaping me in the here and now

my mind is grazing in the pasture like a cow

Absent of your existance, I continue on with my frown

you tire of waiting, before long you completely leave town.

inner blue

by JDG

Slide the dagger into my heart

your idea of pain and suffering is

in no way comperable to the truth.

My eyes have seen and my hands have done

more regretful acts than anyone.

Sorrow sometimes fills me up

to the point of overflow.

I sleep it off and awake with a full cup.

Understand that you can't possibly

comprehend the thoughts that bind me

for my drive steers true

more so true than any of you.

Without the frame in my mind

I am nothing, I am lost

I become you and all other terrible

people like you.

Take my possessions

take my friends and family too

but understand this

you will never be in reach of my inner blue.

time

by JDG

All these years, switching gears

Time eludes me with every beer

Always praying and hoping you'll be near

Finally realizing, it was me, my dear

That forced your pretty face outta here

If only back then, it was this clear

We could sill have our love year after year

The pain of our loss brings me to tears

Doing this again to someone else is now my fear

Axis of time

Is always on my mind

Growing the pain

Hoping from which I gain

Clarity and peace

In this heart that's up for lease

Struggling with doubt

Just can't seem to figure it out

Too many questions

Never getting answered, forcing life lessons

Grasp at the truth

Until it's dishonest and aloof

Kill the shame

Always finding someone else to blame.

throwing rocks

by JDG

Wake up for today

End this forgery and say

I am me

There's no me else to be

So take me as I am

or expose me for a sham

Either fucking way

Tomorrow is a new day

And the stone I throw

Will hit you squarely in your soul

Bouncing back in my face

Destroying ugly lies all over the place